On January, Self-Development and Wintering
So, how has January been treating you?
I had initially planned to title this letter This Is How I’m Making Sure I’ll Be The Best Version Of Myself In 2025, And Here’s How You Can Do It Too—and for that, I can only apologise.
My only excuse is that I have spent the best part of the last four years learning, and then putting into practice, the art of writing a specific breed of headline.
While I do want to spend this letter—my first of 2025 after a brief absence from the thought bubble—sharing the practices that have helped me feel better going into this new year after what has for many of us been four very difficult years following the COVID-19 pandemic, I don’t want to preach to you and I certainly don’t want to hold you accountable on whether you have been busy ushering January in with gym routines and vegan recipes.
Without further ado, and to put to an end this lengthy introduction that would have been the envy of Tolstoy, here are some practices that I will be gripping tightly onto in 2025. The simple reason why being that they make me feel bloody amazing.
Since so many of us have become obsessed with all things wellness, self-care and whatever else Gwyneth Paltrow has been promoting, I thought I’d share a few titbits too. After all, I am a lifestyle journalist now.
So, how has January been treating you?
Is it just me or was this a very long month—or year of its own as many have joked on social media—and one filled with so much unnecessary pressure.
Apologies to any Capricorn readers, but while the start of the year invites us to excitedly rip open new and overpriced journals, the month of January can also feel nauseatingly heavy.
But in the spirit of turning over a new leaf, I have been putting a few new activities and approaches into practice. Well, some new, and some slightly less new. They have each played an important part in making me feel happier, calmer and more whole. Perhaps they will resonate and work for you too.
IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: You can *achieve your goals* and *manifest your highest self* anytime you want. This is not something that is exclusive to the beginning of January, as I am sure you already know.
I have always been curious about the ways in which I could level up my life. I don’t know if that is due to my upbringing, my personality, my star sign or my personality type—libra and ENTJ-A for anyone wondering.
I remember picking up a copy of Seventeen Magazine in George Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston, Texas when I was 12 or 13. I had been visiting family over the Christmas holidays with my parents, and was browsing unfamiliar U.S. book stores and newsagents for something to entertain my then rarely overstimulated mind with on the journey home.
I had always loved anything aesthetically pink and harmless, and so rushed to ask my mum and dad to pay for the edition of Seventeen that I had swung under my arm. I absorbed it on the long flight home, taking in every ounce of preteen advice that had been laid out from what we should be wearing on our first day back to school to which EOS lip balms we should be investing our pocket money and Saturday job savings into.
Somewhere in the middle of the magazine was a write up on the specific exercises that Jennifer Aniston does at home with her personal trainer.
I had never been a particularly sporty child. And while I did take dance classes and make it on to school sports teams (likely because I went to a tiny village-based primary school which left P.E. teachers with little choice for talent), I was always the last person to opt in for an actual workout session.
Still, I decided to give the five or six exercise moves that Jennifer Aniston supposedly did back in 2010 a go.
I noticed a difference in my fitness levels pretty fast—going from struggling for breath during the dreaded 12-minute run at school (a unique type of noughties torture that I assume has since been wiped out of British schools) to confidently being able to keep up with some of the more capable runners in my class—and I decided to stick to the moves I had learned, by incorporating them into on and off pilates regimens, for the rest of my life.
They made me feel better.
As do the following mindset-centred practices that have helped me step into a more calm and confident version of myself this year.
Having A Vision
First, I got clear on how I want to feel and what I want to experience in 2025. I tapped into this by making a massive spider diagram in which I mapped out all of my fears, limiting beliefs, past traumas—and just anything else that had gotten stuck inside me that I could pinpoint as being the root cause of issues like anxiety or perfectionism. I flipped those statements and was able to see who I could be if I was able to let go of those unwanted thought patterns. Bonus tip: I found that making a vision board, with text, can come in handy here, while also being a fun and creative way to get excited for a new year.
Nervous System Regulation
I then continued to stick to a meditation routine, but this time with a more disciplined plan for what kinds of sessions I would do and for how long. I now take time out for meditation nearly every morning and on some evenings too.
I have also continued to make time for my lord and saviour, EFT tapping, every single morning, evening—and most afternoons too if I feel I need it.
I started going out on walks, even in the cold, every morning. I am parent to a dog, which makes this habit easier to achieve, but I do see such benefits from getting some gentle movement and fresh air into my mornings that I would likely be doing the same even if I didn’t have Hugo in my life. Bonus tip: Listening to uplifting or calming music, or meditation tapes on said walks, really helps me maintain a positive, relaxed mindset for the day ahead.
Tapping Into My Inner Child
I started doing more things that my inner child would feel joy from, like indulging in comforting foods, watching things that feel safe, getting through the day without a to-do list, making playlists, reading, writing and thinking creatively.
Shifting My Focus
For the first time in my life, I have been feeling comfortable switching off—and in many cases—avoiding the news. I used to think that not reading up on the news, particularly distressing news, was ignorant—and I know that many people still feel this way. The truth is, I came to realise that absorbing constantly upsetting and triggering content was only helping me to feel low and frightened of the world around me, instead of educating me on the news of the day. The same goes for social media. Don’t get me wrong, there is a time and place, and I still know what is going on in the outer world and online due to my job in journalism and the content I create online, but I no longer take time out of my day to watch, listen to or read into the like. Limiting that noise has helped me step into a calmer version of myself, one with more space to focus on what I want and how I want to feel.
Respecting My Environment
This is not such a big change, as I have always tried to keep a clean space, but this is a habit that I have taken into 2025. I just feel better with a nice and tidy home, particularly bedroom, and I know that many of you can relate.
Respecting Myself
Any reading recovering perfectionists will understand how difficult it can be to slow down and relax into the present moment, particularly when so much is going on or is expected from you. I have been working on shifting this narrative, and silencing the voice inside my head that learned to repeat the mantra that it is not safe or productive to be still and savour the day. I have had to get acquainted with the present moment, uncertainty, not getting everything done, taking things off my plate and not having a plan—all of which was unexpectedly daunting at first, but as time went on I felt better for it. I began to actually recharge during my so-called downtime, and feel more in tune with myself as a result of it.
I have been working on being kinder to and more gentle with myself, because growth, healing and becoming “better” is difficult stuff. I have had to learn to feel proud of myself even before anything has been done, ticked off or changed. Redefining my perception of success to know that I am okay as I am and that if I ever fall off track, I can catch myself and I will be okay. I still have bad days, “rotting in bed” days at that, but have stopped feeling guilty about them. I have allowed myself to feel those feelings, and then bounce back.
Me and winter have never been the best of friends—hence why I wrote that opener in incorrect grammar as a dig to my longtime enemy. Well, this has also been something that I have had to take a long, hard look at. While I’d still trade three months of January cloud and gloom for three minutes in the sun, I have been learning to lean into this season, respect its unique beauty and its many benefits. For me that includes not getting too hot on the tube and the noticeable lack of mosquitoes, my two kryptonites. Learning “the art” of wintering, giving my body some guilt-free rest this season, taking time to convalesce you could put it, getting cosy, and romanticising being snuggled up with a good book and some music has helped.
And now here’s for the fun stuff…
I invested in a new skincare routine (one that actually suits my skin type, does what I need and contains the product ingredients that I actually wanted *hurrah*), got myself some new cotton loungewear to feel comfortable and cosy in while embodying a wealthy coastal divorcee, joined a gym and got some new books for my home library. You don’t need me to tell you that all of these things feel just lovely, and I feel so grateful for having been able to indulge in this way too.
That’s all for now! Thank you for reading and I hope that you all had a fantastic start to the new year <3